Why do condoms sometimes break during sex?
Welcome to Between the Sheets, our no-judgement advice column where we answer your real questions about sex, relationships, pleasure, and everything in between. Got something on your mind? You’re not alone... ask away!
Navigating intimacy, desire and connection isn’t always straightforward. Whether you're in a long-term relationship, dating around, or figuring out what feels good on your own terms, sex can bring up all sorts of questions and not all of them are easy to Google or you don't get a straight answer. That’s where we come in.
Each week, we tackle real-life questions from readers like you. No shame, no assumptions, just honest, inclusive, and practical advice from people who get it. From turn-ons and turn-offs to lube, sex toys and condoms, even topics such as confidence, consent and communication.
We’re here to help you feel a little more seen and a lot more informed.
Got a question? Submit it via our easy-to-use form here and keep an eye out, your question might just help someone else too.
Dear Skins Sexual Health,
I'm thinking about losing my virginity to my boyfriend and I’m scared… What if the condom breaks during sex? How does that even happen? I thought they were supposed to protect you. Can they just snap for no reason? I’m really nervous because I don’t want to get pregnant or catch an STI. I want to be safe, but now I’ve read that condoms can break and it’s got me second-guessing everything. What do I need to know to avoid this? Please help.
Dear Kelly,
Firstly, thank you for asking. Seriously. The fact you’re thinking about this, about safety, about consequences, about getting things right that already puts you ahead of where many people were when they had sex for the first time. This stuff can be confusing, overwhelming even. So let’s break it down and look at why condoms sometimes break, how to reduce that risk, and what it really means to be “safe” when it comes to sex.
Condoms Don’t Just Break on Their Own But They Can, and Often It’s Human Error
There’s this idea floating around that condoms are flimsy or unreliable, like they’re just going to snap mid-way through without warning. That’s not really how it works. Condoms don’t just fall apart because they feel like it. If a condom breaks during sex, there’s usually a reason and more often than not, it’s something that a human has done without realising.
Let’s start with the basics. Condoms are made from latex or polyurethane. They’re pretty strong, considering how thin they are. Before they’re sold, they’re tested and regulated to ensure they can hold up to a fair amount of friction and movement. But and this is where it gets a bit tricky they’re not invincible.
Here are a few very common reasons condoms break:
- Not leaving space at the tip: Condoms need a little room at the end to collect semen. If there's no space, pressure builds during ejaculation and as a result the condom can burst
- Putting it on the wrong way: If you accidentally try to roll a condom the wrong way, then continue to use it before flipping it the right way - there's a chance pre-ejaculate (which can contain sperm or STIs) is already on the outside
- Using oil-based lubricants: Products like Vaseline, baby oil or some massage oils can weaken altex quickly, causing it to tear
- Not using enough lube: Friction during sex without enough lubrication can wear down the condom and cause it to rip, especially if the sex is lasting a while. Skins Condoms come already pre-lubricated, however it is always best practice to add a little more lube into the mix - plus it can feel incredible
- Opening the foil carelessly: Some people tear open a condom packet with their teeth or use their nails, risking nicking the condom before it's even on
- Using an expired condom: Yes, they expire. Over time the material becomes more fragile, and more likely to break. It's always best to check the expiration date on the condom packaging
- Not storing condoms properly: Keeping them in your wallet and/or your car, or other places where they can get hot or rub against other items can damage them before you even use it
Personally, I'd recommend you take a further read of Skins' Guide to Condoms when you're finished reading this article.
Condoms Are Very Effective But They’re Not 100% Foolproof
One of the scariest parts of having sex for the first time is the lingering sense that something might go wrong. That’s understandable. And if you’ve read up even a little, you’ll probably know that condoms don’t guarantee 100% protection from pregnancy or STIs. Which is true. No methods of contraception does. But that doesn’t mean they’re not worth using, far from it.
Here’s the thing: when used correctly, condoms are about 98% effective at preventing pregnancy. That means 2 out of 100 people who use condoms perfectly over the course of a year will still get pregnant. But most of us aren’t using them perfectly. With typical use, which includes the occasional mistake that number drops closer to 85%.
When it comes to STIs, condoms are the best protection available outside of abstinence. They provide a barrier that prevents the exchange of bodily fluids, which is how most STIs are spread. But again, they’re not perfect. Some infections, like herpes or HPV, can be transmitted through skin-to-skin contact in areas not covered by a condom.
So, while condoms are really effective, they’re not magic. It’s easy to want certainty, especially when you’re nervous or doing something for the first time. But sex, like most things in life, comes with some level of risk. The aim isn’t to eliminate risk entirely (because that’s just not possible), but to reduce it as much as you reasonably can.
Sometimes, just knowing what your options are, even in a worst-case scenario makes everything feel less overwhelming. It gives you a sense of control, even when the situation feels unpredictable.
Also, don’t be afraid to talk to your partner about your worries. If this is someone you trust enough to share something as intimate as sex with, they should be someone you can talk to openly. You don’t need to have a big, serious conversation with mood lighting and cue cards. But even a casual, “Hey, I just want to make sure we’re doing this safely, I’m a bit nervous,” can go a long way.
If they dismiss your concerns or make fun of them, that’s a red flag. If they take the time to listen and reassure you, that’s a sign you’re in better hands. Sex shouldn’t be something you feel pushed into, or afraid of. It should be something you feel ready for not perfectly prepared, maybe, but ready in a way that feels right for you.
So yes, condoms can break. But they don’t do it randomly, and the chances are much lower when you use them properly. More importantly, you’re allowed to be nervous. It’s okay to ask questions and want to understand everything before taking a big step like this. That kind of thoughtfulness isn’t a weakness, it’s actually the best kind of strength.
Take your time. Breathe. You’re not alone in your thoughts.
